Wednesday, 23 September 2009

Comments on fear of going to work

Ysbeth Wordsmith made the following comment on my post concerning fear of going to work::

Isn't one of the problems with social phobia a near-total lack of recognition and support from other people? That includes not just bosses but doctors (who should know better, but often don't). So you tell someone, and they mock you and say it's all in your head and you should just stop whining. Then you have to can that doctor and try to find another one who doesn't have his head up his ass. That can take a lot of extra time, money, and energy.
Yes, I agree that social phobia is an illness where understanding and support from other people seems sadly lacking. This also is complicated by the fact that the social phobic in general tends to be secretive about it and tells very few people if anyone. The result is often social isolation and a great feeling of loneliness. This can often turn into depression which then makes the psychological situation of the individual even worse. To that extent I think that the Internet can really help. There are any amount of forums out there where people like us who suffer from phobias can find people who really do understand. Also the fact that this kind of networking has a degree of anonymity helps. By that I mean it is probably easier to write and tell about your phobia than to sit, stare someone in the eye and talk about it. The latter would also increase the fears of rejection or being misunderstood.
The picture of how one shoudl be as an indiviual is often painted by the media and we should not underestimate that influence. Television to a large extent makes big money telling us how we should look, how we should dress, what we should eat, etc. But it also does the same in painting some imaginary picture of how we should behave - energetic, social,  outgoing. Phobics thus tend to suffer from a very weak self-esteem since many feel they do not live up to be what they should be. It does take some doing to rise above these fake clichees which we are fed, especially when we feel extremely vulnerable.


  1. I think it's good of you to run this blog, which raises awareness of social phobias and how to deal with them.

    You're also right about the role of the media. Hm, here's an idea -- how many social phobia sufferers have tried going on a media fast? Spend a week or a month without watching television, going to movies, reading magazines/newspapers, or otherwise absorbing ads and entertainment that mainly make people feel bad about themselves. See if that changes how you feel. If it does, then take more care about what you choose to absorb; surround yourself with magazines and shows that have a more positive tone.

  2. Great blog. Most of the people are suffering because of the Phobias a fear on something and Anxiety. When I suffered because of phobias. I have faced lot of problems in myself. The main thing which make so depressed is I cant enjoy my life with good confidence always I use to fear of the things around me Later I found a good solution for my problem through Hypnosis. They provided a good solution through various hypnosis and hypnotherapy technique. After trying hypnosis I got a good improvement in my self confidence and self control.

  3. In the course of my research, I found your blog on social anxiety and wondered if you would be willing to take a look at the social anxiety program offered by an organization I am involved with, called Learn to Live. They've created an online program based on cognitive behavioral therapy principles to help individuals who suffer from social anxiety. In an effort to gather more feedback on the program and to build its growing community of members, the organization is offering the program for free to those who sign up before the end of April. As someone who has dealt with social anxiety, and become an advocate for those who suffer from it, your feedback on the program would be invaluable. The website for the program is . Please feel free to reach out to me at if you have any questions at all. If you have any questions that would be better answered by Dr. Russ, the psychologist behind the development of the program, I would be happy to connect the two of you as well.

    Stephen Bowie
    Learn to Live Member Outreach

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